We’re in heaven you and I
When I lay with you and close my eyes
our fingers touch the sky.
I’m sorry baby, you were the sun and moon to me.
I’ll never get over you…
You’ll never get over me…
We’re in heaven you and I
I had already imagined us
living the life time of royalty.
The somber sunsets
and chaotic parades
in our name.
I watched the minutes slowing down
when we ran through the park
on summer evenings
when the sun cascaded through
the cracks of branches.
I sank into you.
I had thought the hand I grabbed
was not my own in prayer.
I was mistaken by the fog before me
as the air I breathe.
I succumb to your touch before we even locked eyes
I had already locked your fingers
around my neck, coursing through my hair
Scratching my face.
for a grip on reality.
I lived the life meant to happen
Yet never did.
My fingers slide your cheek
like a pianist rolls his hand
down the teeth of his piano.
He caresses gently
since they move him
with such melody.
I am who I am
whether you love me or not
and I am becoming who I want to be
whether you expected it or not.
The most beautiful thing about you
is how much of a fucking travesty you are
and your chaos
is my kryptonite.
I have taken all my defeats
as best as a damaged man can.
Dreams in the clouds
are now visions in the sky.
no longer which denied,
nor the tears from my eyes.
I have gotten my lungs filled with water
before I learned how to breathe.
I have succumb to the siren
ringing at night
when the world is at sleep.
I am not beaten
I am not dead
I am so much more
than the world has intended for me to be.
Sometimes I’m caught between
waiting for my life to begin
and waiting for the world to end.
In some cases
they feel the same.
Why are there calluses on my hands,
When all I’ve grabbed has slipped
right through my fingers?
How drunk do I get on my birthday?
I am an abundance of broken relationships
of weak family ties
long winded friends
and distant lovers.
I am the scars on my arms
that reach all the way to my heart
from the multiple roses I’ve held
with my hands
in my arms
and thought, they would be as close.
I am the moment you say goodbye
It’s not accompanied by tears but
It has to come to an end this way
and instead of making it something distasteful
to feel ugly about in recollection
you learn that the memories we’ve made
you’ll miss them.
I had the dream of us again
the story we told
of fairy tales and majestic wishes
that take place under the starline
with a city polluted with illumination,
though it all blurs together.
I saw nothing but you.
I saw the sky cave in and give way
of our wishes
when life was as simple as staring at the moon
as it crept it’s way through the shades.
hitting us in sliced pieces.
And your hair filling the canyon that is my collar bone
whispering secrets underneath your breath
to the beat of my heart.
I thought of you again
of when love wasn’t a question
when you smiled at me without me even saying a word.
How life was so unforgiving,
How even when we were feet apart
it felt as though we were 1000 miles away
but when I reached my hand out to you
it’s as though I were here all along.
I dreamt of love again…
Thinking it’d be of you.
Infatuated with chaos.
from the corner which
finesse and destruction meet.
To the edge of your comfort zone.
Death of the self is the next step
I welcome suicide
to relieve and grow
What does it mean when you fall off the earth?
What exactly stays
if you take the wrong step?
Death takes your soul
but as well your shadow.
How do we measure a life
in revolutions of light
if nothing is set right
when the moon bestows night.